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Taking L’s in Love and Learning to Stand Taller After

Posted on May 9, 2025June 25, 2025 by Boluwatife

One time, I created a whole Instagram account, after years of not having one, just to watch a guy’s IG Live. We weren’t dating, but he mentioned it casually, and I took it as a breadcrumb worth following. I watched the live, engaged energetically, might I add (🤦‍♀️), then deleted the account right after. We eventually dated for years. And now? He’s married…to someone else. And me? I’m here, unpacking that story and all the “L’s” I took along the way.

Let’s be so for real, love will humble you.

Sometimes it humbles you in little ways. Like creating a whole Instagram account to support someone who hasn’t even committed to texting you back consistently. And sometimes it humbles you in bigger ways. Like realizing you gave years of your heart to someone who, in the end, did not choose you.

Those moments feel like losses. And in a way, they are. Time, energy, love — all invested into someone who didn’t turn out to be your forever. But here’s what I’ve come to realize, every “L” is a lesson. And sometimes the lesson is: it’s about time you recognized your worth.

You don’t lose your worth just because someone else didn’t recognize it. You don’t become foolish for loving hard — you become human. These experiences only shrink you if you let it. Instead, let them stretch you and grow you. Let it teach you to recognize red flags earlier on. They remind us that love shouldn’t feel like constantly working for someone’s approval. And most importantly, just being who you are makes you worth all the love in the world.

So yes, I took an L. Several, actually. But looking back, each one quietly whispered, “You deserve more.” And I’m finally listening.

Signed, Sought After.

I’ve shared my L and I hope you’ll share yours with us as well. Submit your story here or send us an email at [email protected]. Your L might just help someone else feel a little less alone — and maybe even laugh a little too. And don’t worry, all stories will remain anonymous.

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